It came from beyond…

In a time of darkness, when Hope seemed to have gone out for a pack of smokes and ended up on a boat to China, when television seemed to have become nothing more than an ad delivery service, when the most flawed candidate in the history of our state seemed like a credible threat, well, in those days the people of Michigan finally got a chance to have their say.

Vote, people, and get your friends, relatives and total strangers to do the same.

Michigan’s future isn’t for sale.

UPDATES GALORE:

Ominous music to hum on Election Day!

Kos Posted with a Kattle Kart o’ Komments!!

Michigan Liberal with a … multitude of meh???!!!

Dickiewood Squares: Good Fellas Edition!

Let’s have a big TV-Land welcome for everyone’s favorite ad buying billionaire, Hollywood Dick Devos! It’s time to meet our celebrity guests. If you don’t have time to click the links, you are encouraged to mouse over them. Also, please don’t wonder why almost everyone who is speaking for Dick DeVos is either from out of Michigan or is in his family – it’s bad manners!

President George Bush: Although Dubya has been persona non seeya on behalf of Amway Dick this campaign season (’cause the Dickster said “you stay the hell away, Toxic George“), never forget that the DeVos family was the #1 contributor to Bush/Cheney 2004.

VP Deadeye Dick Cheney – see above, and don’t turn your back on him – he’ll rob you blind!

2008 Presidential hopeful Rudy Giuliani – if DeVos manages to buy a miracle, what’s the over/under on DeVos quitting to run as Rudy’s VP in 2008?

Rev. James Dobson of Focus on the Family – Dick & Betsy love themselves some far, far right causes and few more than that of the Reverend of Right who focuses on the family as he defines it like a killer laser of intolerance.

Fundraiser and Felon Jack Abramoff – It’s unfair to single out Dick for taking Jailhouse Jack on his Potomac River Cruise aboard his yacht Enterprise because really, what powerful Republican didn’t get down with Abramoff?

Dealmaker, Cashtaker, Lawbreaker Tom DeLay – Tom sez thanks: “RAD (Restoring American Dream PAC, founded by Dick DeVos) has played an essential role in maintaining Republican control of the House of Representatives in both 1998 and 2000.”

Evil Genius Karl Rove – Hey, Dick & K-Street are “just friends“!

CEO Superstar Lee Iacocca – Lee lives in California and although his “turnaround” of Chrysler involved a heady infusion of taxpayer dollars, he’s always willing to fire up the charm if the price is right!

Billionairess Betsy DeVos – My Billion-dollar Baby-doll has been told to keep quiet … at least until after the election! I love her, scary eyes and all!

Kos-posted!

Dick DeVos Dove Hunt 2006

There I was: hovering high above the Michigan interWeb like a proud but disappointed eagle when a fast-dodging mourning dove alerted me to this post by some bird-watcher guy. A bird watcher? With a political opinion? Hello in there, Mr. Red-breasted Nuthatch. Let’s leave politics to the politicians … and the soap guys.

Dick Devos is the King of Bling

Get down on the Gold Digger, Dick DeVos Remix and YouTube it up if you’re a true sports racer … and remember: if you want to be flash, fear the man with all the cash!

Shout out to Ze Frank!

Kriss-Kross-Kos

Chairman Dickie Amway China Magic Sign Day!

Greetings Comrades! Today is a glorious day for all by my proclamation! All will be happier, wealthier with whiter teeth on Chairman Dickie Amway China Magic Sign Day! Actually, none will be wealthier or have whiter teeth except Chairman Dickie and the party leaders, but all will be happier in our great wealth and not mind if their own teeth crumble for lack of health care.

The crack team at CHUDD has produced these patriotic and inspirational signs that all soliders in the Dick Devos Army of Cultural Devolution are requested to display with proud immediacy alongside the mandatory picture of Chairman Dickie, their Amway China Collectible Bear and their Amway Dick Action Figure with karate job-chopping action!

You can look at them one by one like tiny jewels or as a cavalcade of delight! It is suggested that for extra Magic Happiness, to listen to patriotic songs!

Jobs to China! More jobs to China!

Kos-posted

Attacking the Interweb, One Blog at a Time

Kommie Kittie reports that Dick Devos has placed 20,000 ads – second in the Nation among all candidates! Good, but not good enough! I must spend more, more more! She also reports on Triscuit’s attacks on my old football coach for having a memory. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: if you have a memory, you can’t be a modern Republican!

Christine Barry has a list of Republican Party Faithful Under Indictment or Convicted and the $100 One Breath Challenge.

Wacko Zacko has fallen into a poll-induced coma and has yet to get his links o’ the day up for today This just in! In the Official Amway Guy poll of 1 likely voter, I WIN* with 100% of the vote – in your FACE, pollsters!! (*+/- 100%)

Over at the Pound Puppies Fan Club, Cordelia Lear is outraged over Saul’s latest pack of lies tying Granholm to people she doesn’t even know and Devos to people he gives money to.

Liberal Lulu says we should fight for our children. I would, I would, it’s just that my face is so deep in the Trough of Tax Breaks that I can’t see them any more!

Betsy DeVos has her eye on something

I can’t figure out what, though. Frankly, it’s kind of creeping me out the way The Billionairess keeps walking around the mansion with a distant look in her eyes, a little half smile on her lips sing-songing “It’ll soon be over now, it’ll soon be over now.”

Rochelle Riley – Rochelle? Is that French? Can we get a deportation order here? – anyway “Madame Rochelle” has written a column titled Don’t forget Betsy DeVos that I hope everyone will skip reading and immediately write an outraged letter to the editor about.
Rile-em-up Riley says that my billion-dollar babycakes was once a nationally known Republican strategist (chairwoman of the Michigan Republican Party for two terms, member of the Republican National Committee and a delegate several times to Republican National Conventions) who state political observers once thought would someday make a great governor. Saulius Maximus responds to that with “She’s someone who would make a great candidate, a great leader. But I don’t see that as a real or practical option.” He does a nice job of delicately skirting the central issue: That Betsy DeVos terrifies even the Republican Party and must be kept far, far away from the media spotlight.

The Columnista then quotes Gil Zeigler, founder of Republicans for Granholm as saying that if Dick DeVos wins “I think she’ll be a very, very powerful first lady. I think he’s too extreme. I think the DeVoses are too extreme. They’re part of the group that has taken the party to the far right, and that’s not what our party was.” Gil, you’re just sore because Betsy played harder ball than a moderate like you could take.

I think the bottom line here is that a lot of people think that Rochelle’s bottom line is true:

Being first lady might be Betsy DeVos’ only chance to push Michigan to be more conservative, friendlier to families and corporations, and more dedicated to educating children in quality schools, even if those schools are private. So we should pay attention to every Betsy DeVos opinion, past or present.

Because if her husband wins, Michigan could have its first Team Governor.

Team Governor? Do I still get to use the stamper thing on the bills??

Dick Devos is a Quitter!

There are some who say that Michigan Candidate for Governor Dick Devos is a Quitter.

Dick Devos is a Quitter?

Some people are saying Dick Devos is a quitter with a record of failure. Look at the Dick DeVos Resume Plan 3.5: Dick DeVos is No Damn Quitter. Richard Marvin “Dick” DeVos is no quitter, people.

I’m gonna rebuttle the heck out of this pack o’ lies and inconvenient truths … just as soon as I watch Transformer Power Hour.

Bye!

.

Dick Devos October Surprise … SPOILED!

DATELINE: GRAND RAPIDS

In an unprecedented move, DeVos will announce that is he prepared to dip into his own personal fortune and pay the state’s revenue shortfall – $3.5 billion or more – if elected govenor. DeVos could lose up to 0.2% of his net worth.

Stupid Michigan Caucus, always spoiling my surprises (click that to read the release and see the video)

Dickie Rich: The Poor Little Rich Candidate

A search on “Dick Devos is Rich” leaves little doubt that Google still has no love the Disembodied Head. It also finds that Diamond Dick is the richest man to run for governor in state history. This little lady notes that Dick Devos has bucked tradition and refused to disclose his tax returns. Memo to Michigan from the gold-plated desk of Dick Devos: You don’t care how much I pay or don’t pay in taxes, you care only about your own taxes. If for some reason you do care, my finances are “an issue we will address openly and directly at the appropriate time”. Which is not now. So bugger off!

Still, voters are a curious lot (at least as compared to say … reporters) and many still want to know “Well how much money does Dick Devos have?”. The Granholm campaign tried to make this an issue (story) saying “DeVos’ arrogant refusal to open his tax return to public inspection, the way Gov. Granholm and every other recent candidate has done, makes it clear that he is hiding something.” The campaign responded that the allegation was “ludicrous”, which was apparently code for “nothing to hide … except Alterra“.
During the final debate, the Tricky Dick was accused of setting up a Bermuda tax haven to hide profits from Amway’s overseas operations. Sadly, the crack delegation of journalists dispatched to investigate the claims vanished in the Bermuda Triangle.

So how much money does Dick Devos have? The answer is: Dick Devos sure as hell isn’t going to tell you.

Cross-posted as MI-GOV: Dickie Rich, Poor Little Rich’s Boy on Kos. Feel free to steal this picture below for your blog or whatever. In fact, steal whatever the heck you want ’cause Dick Devos sure as hell plans on stealing from you!