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Dick Devos Wants ALL Your Money, Michigan

October 12, 2006

Dick Devos Wants ALL Your Money, Michigan
Gonna make this one as simple as possible, Michiguys and Michigals because the election is less than a month away and the Head’s gotta get back on the Road for Change. It’s time to take back Michigan for the corporations and special interests and we need every vote, and every last dollar!

Michigan is on the rocks, your life sucks and we’re all doomed. The one chance we got is to make this state boom again with business. The auto industry is gone and she ain’t coming back. Michigan needs to find a new business to be in, and Dick Devos knows business.

There are those who say that it’s a bad time for a billions in Michigan tax cuts, but everyone knows that when the going gets tough, the tough cut taxes. The best place to start cutting is for the most wealthy and that means me! Sure, Dick Devos would benefit from the elimination of the personal property tax and the schools and local governments that depend on the tax for 15/20/50%+ of their operating budgets would be in trouble, but Dick Devos is a businessman, just like Dick Cheney or George W. Bush. Dick Devos will figure it out … after you elect him. Probably.

There’s some pink panties out there (Yeah, I’m looking at YOU L. Brooks Patterson!) saying “We can’t keep the police and firemen on the street and the school doors open if you take away this tax.” Quit yer whinin’, I’m telling you that I’ll figure it out – I’m a businessman. In business. You know, Amway.

So just close your eyes, send in your absentee ballot early, buckle up extra tight and get ready to ride with Dick Devos into a tax-free future, Michigan.

PS: If you’re thinking that you can escape your fate by voting against Dick Devos, maybe you can … a little, but check out the riff Soup Lady is laying down:

For 99 percent of Michiganders, the Bush tax cuts are much smaller than the share of the increased national debt they’ll have to pay off. Only the wealthiest one percent are net winners.

Everyone in the wealthiest 1% raise your hands. Go on, stick ’em up, Michigan.
Fear the Head people, Fear the Head.

Props to the Forbes House of Billionaire Masks for the really cool mask, cross-posted to King of France.

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