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Lies, Dick Devos says. Nothing but lies, more lies and damned lies!

August 3, 2006

Math with Dick Devos
Sometimes as I float around the internetses, I come across something that’s so untrue that I have to bring it back here and explain it to you piece by piece so you know what truth is. DeVos: Time to Do the Math is just such a thing.

DeVos: Time to Do the Math

Lansing – The Michigan Democratic Party today presented Republican gubernatorial candidate Dick DeVos with a special gift to help him calculate the cost of his economic agenda – a Chinese made abacus.

OK. This is true. It’s neat how the wood pieces go back and forth. I played with it for hours until the Billionairess got mad and took it away from me.

The abacus was hand delivered to the DeVos campaign headquarters in Lansing, a day after the Michigan Democratic Party estimated the cost of DeVos’ economic plan at least $5.1 billion. That figure represents more than 60% of Michigan’s general fund budget. To date, DeVos continues to refuse to tell voters how he will pay for all of his proposed spending until after the November 7th general election.

Now this is all wrong. My plan isn’t finished. I am only on Michigan Turnaround Plan 2.0: Agriculture, Sheep and Duckies. I have quite a few more yet to release so to borrow a line from the good farmers of this state, “Let’s just wait until all the horses have gotten away before we close the barn door on this.”

Perplexed“Dick DeVos’ campaign admitted yesterday that they have no idea how they will pay for the massive new spending that DeVos has proposed,” said Michigan Democratic Party Chair Mark Brewer. “While Governor Granholm has balanced $4 billion in left behind budget deficits without raising taxes, Dick DeVos has proposed at least $5 billion in new spending that would require massive cuts in services or massive tax increases. Before the people of Michigan cast their vote in November, they deserve to know which it’s going to be.”

There they go again. “Dick Devos is going to cut services.” “Dick Devos is going to raise taxes.” “Dick Devos is going to leave Michigan a battered, smoking wreck from which every last penny has been sucked by the super rich.” “The people deserve to know”. Well I’ll tell you this much, with Dick Devos, they people will never know what’s going on! Dick Devos cares about the people of Michigan too much to let them worry. Since worry is basically thinking about the future, let’s just wait for Michigan Turnaround Plan 2.0: Schools to Prisons before we worry about worrying because I think there will be no more worries about thinking when I’m through with the schools!

Brewer also noted the new abacus is perfect for DeVos because it was made in China.

“After DeVos is done figuring out how much he’ll have to raise taxes on our families to pay for his new spending, he can use the abacus to calculate the exact number of jobs he sent to China,” added Brewer. “And if he doesn’t know how to use the abacus, he can get one of his tens of thousands of Chinese workers to help him.”

And they say Dick Devos doesn’t know how to create jobs!

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