Below is a bunch of boring stuff where the Disembodied Head of Dick Devos questions his own existence and accuses Google of Bad Things.
Archive for October 3rd, 2006
Dick Devos IS Secret Amway Man
October 3, 2006Yes daddyos & mommyos and people who hate America and choose to be childlessos, it’s time for Tuesday Afternoon Chart Toppers with your host, the Disembodied Head who’s baking up that Payola Bread. This week’s smash single that’s burning up the charts, the ozone layer and the Pere Marquette State Forest is Secret Amway Man starring the Hunk with the MLM Junk, Darlin’ Dick Devos!*
Beware of pretty faces that you find,
a pretty face can hide an evil mind
Kids these days don’t know WHAT they’re missing!
*If you’re curious to know more about this dashing International Man of Mystery, be sure to read the tell-nothing biography that is banned on 5 continents, the island territory of Guam and within the city limits of Ada: Dick Devos: The Unauthorized Biography.
If you want to know more about Amway, I can’t stop you from going to this web site about Amway. But really, can’t we just forget that most of Dick Devos’s money comes from Amway and pretend it came from the Lottery or something?
Dick Devos has a Robot Army!
October 3, 2006
Over at Michigan Communist Party HQ, they are in a tizzy for a couple of reasons. Reason #1 is of course my unprecedented smackdown of the Gal Governor. Readers of one out of one papers that I practically own agree – Dick Devos whooped Jenny G’s pert heinie last night – booya!
Also “Louise the Dog” writes:
I was folding my laundry when the phone rang. It was a robo-call in a woman’s voice talking about how “disappointed” she was in Granholm’s performance of the debate last night. The tone was supposed to sound like she was a Granholm supporter who “just felt let down.” There was no mention of DeVos, no mention of who paid for the call, the Caller ID said “Unknown Caller.” Unfortunately, I wasn’t at my answering machine or I would have taped it.
The vast majority of voters who never saw the debate would have no basis to doubt the caller’s points. Has any one else gotten this call? I am in the Grand Rapids area.
OK. Louise? First off, you are a dog. I know the Democrats want EVERYONE to have a vote, but this is ridiculous. Second, some folks may wonder how we could have found a person who was “disappointed” with Granholm’s performance so fast, gotten her on tape and fed it to the robocall program, all in less than 14 hours after the debate ended. Here’s how the boys down at CHUDD explained it to me: The woman on the phone isn’t an actual Granholm supporter or even a Devos supporter. In fact, she’s not a woman at all – she’s a ROBOT! Part of the Dick Devos Robot Army!
Pretty innovative, huh? We cut out that whole bothersome “working with humans” thing and go straight to the robots. Their reaction speed is many hundreds of times that of a human being AND they work for the kind of wages that Dick Devos likes to pay!
Right now we just have them making phone calls based upon Devos campaign buzzwords like “disappointment”,”doom, “despair” and “hopelessness” but I’m told that soon will be able to have them perform all sorts of tasks on the behalf of the campaign.
Fear me!
Update! Someone over at The Jennifer Granholm Fan Club taped the Robot Army in action. I was disappointed that there was no mayhem. Memo to scientists: version 2.0 must have mayhem!
Update x2!! I’m very disappointed that Jennifer Granholm Fan Club President Matt “Cory” Michlib has set up the Michigan Robocall Repository. Ha! Think you can imprison my Mighty Decepticons?? Not likely! In addition to robocall tapes, “Cory” is asking for Junk Mail.
